Different worlds, looser knots and acting aspirations.

Life. Life is a journey we go through. Life is what makes us and breaks us. Life is crashing but enjoying the fall.
I've heard that in life we have to make our own experiences, learn by ourselves. Sure we can follow advice every once in a while, but in the end all we want is to have lived.
Now you can go through life having done what you wanted and left a mark, or you can go by unnoticed and living for others. I believe we should live as much as we can, because no one gets out alive anyway.
How do you live when you're being held back?
I live in a small town. You see lots of things here, but nothing compared to what you see in New York or L.A. I'm not a small town kind of person. I have big city dreams and where I am I feel like Im doing nothing at all.
When I go to college I don't want to be THAT girl. You know, the girl who doesn't know anything about life? That girl who can't do her laundry, who can't read trouble, who never picked up on the lingo, who never had a summer love, who never went away for summer camp, who never grew up... I don't want to be her.
For my age I am mature on some things and still a kid for others. For example, I've been waiting 7 years to go to the New York Film Academy. Why? Becaus that's what I want to do and I know it. I want to be an actress. I have known it since I was 5. I know it's difficult; I know there's a lot of rejection, but I can deal.
I want to be able to go away from home to see if I can survive. Home is not the problem. Its the place where home is. I want to be able to leave this town behind even if its just for 3 weeks and forget everything. Breathe, eat and live acting. I want to know new people; people who are different from the ones I know (not that all the ones I know are so bad).
I love my mom and my dad. I mean, they are my world. They have been there when no one else has been. They are each others' balance. Realistic vs. Optimistic. Extrovert vs. Introvert. Show bussines vs. Office buddy. Thats why I love them. But sometimes they cease to understand the world I'm leaving in. Sometimes it's hard to let go and I'm not asking them to let go. I'm just asking them to tie me with a looser knot. I just want one thing. One little thing they cannot give me. I know they give me much more than I deserve every single day. Someday I hope I can be a good enough daughter for them. Until then, they know this is a dream I'm not giving up on. I found something that I love and I'm great at, so I will continue to work on it 'til I succeed.
I reccommend you do that too.